I tried to be so patient but I lost it as I saw her comment this subuh. I tried to hold it, but the ache just won't fade away, it felt like I got stabbed and there's nothing I could do. And of course I cried. So bad. It was more to tears of regrets than sadness. I felt like I needed justice. It's unfair as I'm the only one who's suffering here. And she doesn't have a clue of what I feel cause yeah, she's so happy being with you there. So I dm-ed her, I told her what's been going on with us all this while behind her, all our conversations and pics, but somehow I unsent the messages right after I sent them. But then I still rasa sakit, I saved her number and unblocked her on ws. I was very close to typing everything out. But after giving it a long thought, I decided to shower and solat first. I had a little battle between my thoughts and my feelings in the bathroom. A huge side of me urged me to tell her everything and let her feel a fraction of what I've been holding inside. But after solat & reciting quran, I just feel like it's not worth it, to destroy her feelings when she only wanted to taste happiness. I feel like the end of us had nothing to do with her, she just happened to come to you at the right time. What's done is done now, I shouldn't grief about it at all. Who am I to question things, when I know He is the best planner?

So now that I just woke up, I feel calmer and more relaxed. It's true then that letting go is one of the best ways for you to achieve inner peace.