Hi, awak. I miss you so much and it has just been a couple of days. Although I don't really see us going anywhere, I'm hoping that we'll last as long as we need and if it has to end, let it be a happy one, alright? And when that time arrives, I'll blame no one but myself for getting into this kind of 'trouble'. Idk why but i can't stop liking you and feeling guilty and stupid at the same time.. Maybe that it's too late & we've gone so far, I don't see any way out anymore.

You know, even if I could turn back time, I won't change a thing about us. I don't wanna miss any of your presence in my life no matter in what form it comes. Your laugh, your jokes, your wishes, your singing, your voice, your care, your smile, your touch, your everything. Just you, Harif/titi/gemok/sayang/awak. Why do you have to be so far and busy as hell :( or maybe it's His way of separating us in the best way?

All and all, I hate myself so much for doing this but.. sigh I just can't really push you away. And I'm being so fucking selfish yet pathetic for stealing her happiness to have mine. I'm really sorry Sarah, I truly am.